Just took some photos of all the Still Life Painting class assignments I have so far. I think I'll post them. All of them. Even the crappy ones. :D

Have some cellphone pictures of this week's Digital Illustration homework:


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   LOOK IT'S LIVEJOURNAL. I haven't been here in a while. I never have the energy to write about my day, gather pictures, etc. :( And worst of all I fall behind on my friends' journals really quickly. orz So I missed a lot of things and I feel bad. D:

   Well! Anyway. I guess I'll jsut write stuff and then find some pictures to post. Oh did I ever mention how irritating it is that when I right click on a misspelled word, LJ doesn't give me any suggestions for the proper spelling? Yeah, I guess I can't let a single entry pass by without complaining about this site somehow.

   My birthday went by, and as usual it lasted for a few days. Saturday birthday, the day I invited my friends over; Sunday birthday, the day my family came over instead of my friends; and Monday birthday, my actual day of birth spent like every other monday except I got leftover cake. I got a few weiiiird wonderful gifts on Saturday birthday. Jessica got me a pez-dispenser type thing (it's not even pez brand, some ripoff lol) with Link's head on it. Instead of benignly dispensing candy, it has a little apparatus that SHOOTS the candy out. So I shot candies at Jessica's face until my dad told me to stop lol. From Cali I got a wonderful floppy bear with nice neon colored fur, which I named Garry after Garry's Mod (because of the floppiness of its limbs). And Stephanie couldn't come because she's out of state, so she drew me a summary of all the important parts in my life from her point of view. :'D I love getting weird gifts that are homemade/cheap/hilarious. I'm relatively easy to shop for in this way.

   A commemorative drawing of our party can be found here on facebook.

   Hmmmrm, what else... I swear I had thought of tons of stuff to write about. But then I didn't have the energy, and then I forgot. orz

     Oh! Well, I also got "The Girl who Leapt Through Time" from my mom, and my whole family watched it together. Watching it again not only rekindled my love and admiration of Yoshiyuki Sadamoto's designs, but also reminded me why I love anime so much as a drawing style. The designs are so simple, yet they get the point across perfectly. Where in my Clothed Figure drawing class we are encouraged to use tone together with line to show three dimensions, it gets too complicated for my liking. In illustration as my school's department teaches, one of the big goals (concerning technical skill/application) is to make the subject look 3D. But looking at anime, two parallel, subtly curved lines can create the shape of an arm, where in my clothed figure class we would have to add shading around to illustrate the elbow, angle, etc. Looking at The Girl Who Leapt Through Time, there are some scenes where there is entirely NO shading on the characters. But somehow I love how that looks so much, because then it's the knowledge of anatomy that makes the figure pop. Imagine, drawing a detailed portrait of someone with flippy, fluffy hair. The mass of hair is complicated and detailed. Then, jsut take the outside edge of that hair. That is what the designs in The Girl who Leapt Through Time look like to me. Except not jsut with hair; with arms, clothes, everything. I love it. Being able to demonstrate accurate anatomy with as few lines as possible is what I'd like to do. I don't know why I love how that looks, I jsut do.
     So, inevitably I come to this subject: can I survive drawing anime in art school? This semester is my third, and really it's the first time anyone has shown me any bother about it. My clothed figure teacher came up behind me during one of our breaks in the day while I was drawing Daichi and Suzu, and he said "They look exactly the same," in a sort of good-humored way, but still. I turned around and said "To you they do." He was just like well ok, if you must! and then moved on. I was a little bitter at him for coming up to me without warning (at least save the critiques for classwork, right?) but I was glad he didn't pursue the subject. Also, the second assignment I turned in for that class was four drawings of Stefan (numbers 32 33 34 35) drawn in my usual style, and he totally didn't mention anything bad. And later down the line he reprimanded someone else for drawing anime style, lol. (She had that...really... generic, beginner-style anime style OTL) I felt good that mine had slipped through.
     Anyway, another time was when the guy who sits next to me in my English class asked to see my drawings. When he saw them, this first thing out his mouth was "So many people draw anime at this school." so I said "Yeah, but how many can draw it well?" I felt good about myself lol. When it comes to strangers, I am horrible at timely comebacks. But I guess since I feel so secure in my opinions on the merit of anime, I can whip one out in that situation.
     Upon starting art school, I stated explicitly to myself that I will not compromise myself in what I want to do. If I still want to do anime, I am going to do anime until the end of my days and I am going to be badass at it. And if someone wants me to not do anime, then I will do anime so well that their eyes bleed. I will try to make american anime respectable.

     I came to the conclusion that I am in school to better myself before I am in school to get job training. My personal priority is self-satisfaction in my own skill, not my grades. So I won't be bending myself to get the grade if it means compromising myself.

     But still, I won't fail any classes either. ;D


     Hahhh. Does anyone else know how good it feels to put your foot down and be candid with yourself? To say something "definitely"? I hardly ever do that, always waffling around with "I think maybe" and "I'd like to if I can". I prize modesty, but sometimes I feel like I need to reaffirm my own value to myself. It feels kinda good.


     Anyway. I guess now this entry is too long to add pictures. Plus I have to go to bed. 8D Thanks for reading.

Write out the names of your characters and explain:
1.) How you thought of their name.
2.) What made you create the character in the first place.
3.) How the character has changed over time (If they have changed).
4.) Any random fun fact about that character.


1) Suzu
-"Suzu" means "bell", which I liked the sound of because I imagined him with a really clear and charming voice.
-I created him and Daichi together... hurr because I had just gotten into BL and was exploring it. By making my own characters. Honestly, their designs were based on Kaworu and Shinji at first (my induction into BL)
-He started out as a naive, innocent, sheltered rich boy. And now he is more delusional than naive, lol. He got meaner as time went on too, but that also means he got kinder to make up for it. He has a lot of things to make up for now.
-Erica (postsocratic ) was INVALUABLE in developing Suzu's character. So if you like Suzu, give her your praise.


2) Yui
- I was trying to think of a delicate-sounding name. Then last semester, one of my classmates (male) was named Yui (it's a girl's name), and I liked the way it sounded on a boy, so I took it lol.
- I had a really interesting dream that I developed Yui's story from.
- He hasn't changed much, actually. Well I guess in the beginning I didn't think much about Yui's thoughts themselves, I thought mostly about his outward habits and actions. But once I got those pretty solid, I moved into his head and he became a much more fleshed-out, albeit tragic, character.
- In the dream this story was based on, the parts of Yui and Sean were played by Kaworu and Shinji, respectively. orz Another set of characters based on my OTP.


3) Sissumi
- Admittedly, "Sissumi" is a nonsense word I made up when I was trying to make a japanese-sounding name. But that was a LONG time ago, in middle school when I first started drawing anime.
- She was one of my very first characters that I kept changing and changing until I got a good story idea mapped out, inspired by End of Evangelion. (orz that show... so much inspiration I feel like a thief sometimes)
-Sissumi, in her first form, was a rip-off of a cat girl from one of those "how to draw manga" books. I eventually dropped her. Then revived her again a year or two later briefly, then forgot her again. The Sissumi of today is Sissumi version 3 you could say, and she is COMPLETELY different from the first two, almost opposite.
-A while ago I came up with an explanation for her gibberish name (it might sound sort of silly so brace yourself); Her manufacturing code is 515-su-m1 (orz). 515 is her number, "su" means "special unit" (because she was made for a specific task. THEM makes many things, all given numbers, but some of them might be something as simple as automated house cleaning drones that are mass-produced), and "m1" stands for "make #1" (meaning she is the first copy of unit #515. the make # is more important for mass-produced units. "special units" are never mass produced, so their make number is always 1). Anyway, when Sissumi landed on earth she crashed, and didn't know anything about herself or why she was there. So when asked her name, she translated her manufacturing code into english lettering.
There you have it. orz


4) R.K.
- She's new, just in case you don't know who I'm talking about (see elaine-sensei.deviantart.com/art/character-madlib-meme-138263093 ) Her name stands for "Radio Kid". I have no story or explanation for her. There was this vague idea of "what if she was in a band? Or something?" which is basically where her name came from. Really, it's all kind of random.
- I forget what made me draw her. I think it was once when I saw a photo of a punk-looking girl with a buzz-cut and a dirty face, wearing a clean new schoolgirl uniform. The contrast was sort of disarming, and I liked it. I tried to design an unreadable mask, and I think I did pretty well; depending on how I draw it, I can't decide if it looks angry, despairing, or humorous.
- She hasn't changed really. As I said, she's brand new lol.
- extra fact? Umm... I always imagine her being good at Parkour. It's really dramatic in my mind, I'd like to draw it sometime.


5) Levy/Demitri
- I always lump these two together lol. I named them so they'd have similar sounding names; I guess all they got were the end sounds. "Demitri" ended up being an unusual spelling of that name because I wanted to be able to have Steven call him "Demi" and he/she could say "Levy and Demi" like the names of toy dolls or something. Levy's name came from one of my little sister's classmates in elementary school.
- Simple... I wanted twin characters. orz
- I guess they changed somewhat. In the beginning, they were mostly womanizers. Now, there's still a little bit of that, but that behavior stems mostly from the newer idea that they wish to take nothing seriously in life.
-The way I remember which one is which is because Demitri's ahoge points down. Demitri. Down.


6) Trish
- I had no idea what to name him, then I talked with one of my friends on MSN and got some name suggestions. From that I took "Trishtan", so he can be nicknamed Trish. Recently I changed it to just plain old Tristan. But Trish is still his nickname.
- This character was inspired by various songs by the group Bent (example). I imagined a guy with that voice, lol. So now, basically anything sung by Zoe Johnston reminds me of Trish.
- Trish has basically been on the same track for his entire existance. He just got more developed as time went on. I guess in the beginning he wasn't as sexually curious as he turned out to be. Also he used to look a LOT more like a girl.
- Random fun fact... hmm. He is really hard to draw right. XD; There's something about him that I can't quite wrap my head around.


And, by request of Matt:
7) Elaine (lol)
- My parents wanted to give me a name that couldn't easily be made fun of. Try to think of a mean play of words on my name, I dare you. >:D
- What made my parents create me? Uhh lol.
- How I have changed over time. Lol, when I was little I was a crybaby and a whiner. These days I try to complain as little as possible. Basically, I don't want to be as annoying as I was when I was a kid.
- When I was a little angsty kid I hated my name, but now I kinda like it.

But don't worry there are also drawings after the meme!



YOU
1. Name:
2. Date of birth:
3. Where you live:
4. What makes you happy:
5. Currently listening/the last thing you listened to:
6. Do you read my journal?:
7. If yes, what makes it especially good or bad?:
8. An interesting fact about you:
9. What do you love at the moment?:
10. Favourite place to spend time:
11. Favourite lyric:
12. The best time of the year:

RECOMMEND
1. A film:
2. A book:
3. A band, a song, or album:
4. A manga/anime (or many if you wish):

PLUS
1. One thing you like about me:
2. Two things you like about yourself:
3. Look at my friends-list and tell what you like about one of our mutual friends:
4. Put this in your journal so that I can tell you what I like about you.


( Drawingssss )

I didn't realize today was 9/11 until just a few hours ago (and of course now it's technically 9/12, but that doesn't really matter). I started thinking about when the event actually happened. That day, I was in sixth grade and I had no idea what had happened because I don't watch the news. But I do remember noticing the air filled with bad karma and tension as I walked through the school. I didn't know what happened even as our social studies teacher explained it to us, and inside myself I denied the gravity of this event for a few years after that. I think it took me a long time to become mature enough to handle thinking seriously about such a devastating and grave event. Now I am, and when I think about what happened my eyes almost always begin to sting. Bitter feelings, and tears for how useless it all seemed. So many, so many people died and though it inspired us Americans to work together for the days immediately following, look what it prompted our former president to do. A retaliating move into Afghanistan quickly dissolved into an attack on Iraq under the pretense of danger. It was a huge lie; We were afraid. Many people died in Iraq as well.

The whole thing from start to finish, George Bush's entire presidency, is laughable and sad and frightening. Not only the leadership, but the way people in this country are acting. I see so much idiocy and self-centered super capitalism it makes me sick. Sick, but also very, deeply sad. Sad because in the past, the US was seen by many as a powerful figure, often one that offers refuge to the poor and gives equal opportunity to all. But we've become so, so capitalist that my mother can't even obtain health insurance, just because she had cancer. Because... who in their right mind would want to pay money for some sick person when you can just keep that money for yourself?

The other day I was waiting at the bus stop in the morning to go to school. I looked across the street and saw a McDonalds. I noticed they have a flag. A McDonalds flag, strung up right next to our stars and stripes. And I stopped and thought about it. McDonalds is our culture, isn't it? When I try to pin down our "American" culture, all I can get is "fat, hamburger eating, gun-toting, loud, morons." That pretty much crushed my hope, at least for the rest of the day.



Oh, here's something interesting. A thunderstorm started outside a little while ago. Probably, it was pretty far away. But I saw a flash of light from the lightning first. I didn't know what it was, so I waited. When their wasn't a thunder noise to accompany it right away, I automatically started thinking that it was some sort of attack, like a nuke or something. Why would that happen?

Also, along the same vein, earlier today four helicopters flew over our neighborhood. My first assumption for why they were there was not by any means a positive one.


Anyway, in conclusion, Canada seems like a pretty cool place to be sometimes. :(

Probably not lol.

Anyway, I don't have any drawings to post lately so I might as well not bother. Here is updates:

-This week I had Jury Duty. I went in on Monday. We were told the case might go until as late as friday. I told them if it does go until Friday, I wouldn't be able to make it because I had an appointment for wisdom teeth extraction then. The judge noted it, and yet I was put on the jury as an alternate anyway. This sucked because 1) it is boring enough to sit in a chair for hours through a very routine drunk driving case, and 2) I am an alternate, which means I have to pay attention to everything but I won't even be able to participate in the deliberation. Anyway, on thursday one juror doesn't show up. So I am moved to the position of actual juror, only to be excused at the end of the day because of my wisdom teeth appointment (as the case did indeed continue on to friday). Long, boring.

-As for wisdom teeth, that went surprisingly well. They gave me laughing gas, and once I started feeling silly enough I announced to every doctor in the room "Hey guys I am going to laugh now" and I did. The last thing I remember was a nurse asking me what I was studying in school, and me answering Illustration, then I was out like a light. Apparently removing four wisdom teeth takes under an hour! Kind of cool.
Anyway, the recovery was leagues easier than I thought it'd be. It's different for everyone. But the most pain I've been in is a soreness/stiffness in my jaw, nothing bothersome at all. The only reason I'm even bothering with the painkiller is I tend to grit my teeth, and it just becomes irritating.
My mom has been asking me if I'm ok and if she can get me anything. But really, I was up and walking around as if nothing was different about an hour after I returned home on friday. Oh, but I got milkshakes for dinner. lol.

-Today my sister and I bought Imogen Heap's new album, Ellipse. I currently have it on repeat, and I probably will for weeks, cause it's so awesome.

In regards to the previous journal entry: thank you all for the encouraging comments, they made me feel a lot better. I washed my face, went to bed and slept well afterwards. :)
But now I'm going to hide that journal. In truth, I end up regretting posting it; I had originally written it as a normal personal journal entry type of thing intended to blow off steam. It served its purpose, and then the next day I couldn't identify with any of the sentiments expressed in the entry anymore because I had let them all spill out then. Today I wore nondescript blue jeans and one of my video game t-shirts and felt just fine.
I am glad I posted it, because I got to hear all your thoughts on it, but I don't feel like I need to look at it anymore.

Now! Onto this entry. I just remembered I intended this to be a sketch journal (lol) so I guess I'll post some sketches?

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I think a lot about my characters and their stories. I often analyze my way of creating them and stuff. But I never really find opportunities to talk about those thoughts though, lol. So I thought I might as well right them down so I can remember, and then I thought as long as I'm writing them down I might as well post just in case someone would like reading it.


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So... much.... homework


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